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Use care when speaking; words are spiritual containers

  • Published
  • By Chaplain (Lt. Col.) Philip Barker
  • 437th Airlift Wing chaplain
"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me."

Most of us learned from a very early age this is not true. We know from our own experience that words have power, either for good or for bad.

The book of Proverbs tells us that "death and life are in the power of the tongue." In fact, words are spiritual containers. They can contain love, kindness, encouragement, patience and joy. They can also contain anger, hatred, fear, arrogance and jealousy. I have been on the receiving end of both ... you probably have too. I can remember positive and negative things that were said to me (or about me) even from my childhood years. Those words had a powerful impact on my life, relationships and view of the world around me.

We have been entrusted with the ability to exert great influence in the lives of those around us -- our families, friends, co-workers and even strangers -- through the power of words. What we say and how we say it can make a big difference, for better or for worse. Furthermore, words are a barometer that give us valuable insight into what is going on in our own lives, and in the lives of other people.

The scriptures say that "out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks." What we say is a strong indication of what we are thinking, feeling and experiencing at any given time. That's why as leaders, supervisors, parents and friends we need to be good listeners. We need to be able to pick up on what is going on in the lives of those around us. Are they sad, stressed, afraid, hurt, discouraged, angry, happy, excited, supportive or content?

What people say, and how they say it, can give us valuable clues in discerning what's happening with them so we can better understand them and respond accordingly. One way to be a better wingman is to strive to be a better listener. As the saying goes ... maybe that's why we were given two ears and only one mouth.

To "bless" literally means to "speak well of." I encourage you to be a blessing to those around you. Speak well of people (to their faces and behind their backs), encourage them, express appreciation for the things they do. If it becomes necessary to correct, confront or resolve a conflict, speak the truth with a civil spirit. If you are angry and feel like you are about to fly off the handle, take a few moments to cool down before you speak.

What we choose to say can have a lasting impact in people's lives. Remember, "death and life are in the power of the tongue."